Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Blerg Blogger!


Listening to the Amelie Soundtrack feeling weepy and nostalgic.  

Caught in a hollow place of looking back and looking forward.  
Limbo.  

Not quite present.  
Not quite absent.

Tired.

Determined.
Hopeful.

Blogger hasn't let me upload a photograph for weeks now.
That being said,
Mike and I (mostly Mike) have been working on my Christmas present.
My very own website; 
A place to streamline and combine my online presences into one...
photos
shop
blog
archives from my most recent blogs "apples for poppy anne" + "apples with honey"
links to facebook + pinterest

Details to come.

I create for two reasons:
1.) I love the ever elusive challenge of creating something pretty
2.) To make money

Some days it doesn't feel like I accomplish either of those.  The truth is that becoming homesteaders costs money.  There is always something to buy; tree felling, fixing wood stoves, trailer hitches, feed, building supplies, tools, books in addition to all the requirements of daily life; organic food, organic meat, clothing, winter boots.  Of course, it is short term pain for long term gain, but our one income household has taken a beating in the last 6 months.

There are days I wonder why I try to do so many things.  There are days I wish I could just concentrate on being a great, present mama.  There are days I just can't take another second of the one sided conversations and boredom.  There are days I wish I could find the nerve to start a little family photography business to take the pressure off Mike who uses his vacation days to do side work.  There are days when oatmeal and toys are enough.  There are days when I need to feel productive.  There are days I wish I could forget about making money and find ways to save it instead.

There are days I feel like my full time job is doing laundry and peeling clementines.

I am so glad to be home snuggling with my little squishy faces and watching them grow everyday, but my, oh my it is one intense gig.  I put the question out to you lovely readers: How do you crafty mama bloggers manage your time?  What do you sacrifice in order to make it work?  Please share your time management secrets with this weary mama.

go gently + be wonderful

e.

6 comments:

  1. I certainly don't feel like I have an answer, and really I doubt that there is a simple answer. But I so understand where you are coming from!
    I have a poster on my bedroom wall and it is the first thing I look at in the morning...it says "It will all be ok". Some days it works for me, some days it doesn't. But at heart I do believe it.
    Keep the faith.

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  2. I wish I had an answer to your question, but all I can say is that I'm glad I'm not the only one. I still haven't built up the nerve to try to start selling stuff. I can't stop thinking about it though. I like making things. We could use the extra income. I don't know why I don't. I suppose it's because I'm not sure I'll know how to juggle it all. I'm not sure I know now. All I know is that somehow things come together. Everything works out one way or another. Best of luck to you! I'd love to hear if you do figure out how to manage it all!

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  3. first: Amelia... sigh, love.
    second: a Christmas website gift... sounds like a gift to US, can't wait to see it!
    third: yes, I hear you. feel you. on the crafting/mama angle. I'll guess you've read my rants over at my blog... but I try to work a morsel of crafting into each day (whether its while she naps.. or the evening). I want it to inspire her too.. to live creatively... but I want to watch that i don't over-focus on it and find I've 'made something pretty' but missed being with my pretty wee soul of a daughter - she's of more value. I know you toss and spin - like all of us - but the balance will find you some days, and they'll be glorious... and then we spin... and then we soar, on and on.
    xo
    Mel ;o)
    www.needleandnestdesign.blogspot.com

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  4. oh dear, its a quandary that I think most mothers who stay home face at some point (hmm, maybe regular intervals). To be honest I don't craft. Nope. I do a little sewing, but I wouldn't call it crafting. Some days are good, some days you'd like a do over, and some days are crap. Yet the one thing that is true, it that the days do fly by once you look at them.
    sending good day vibes your way.

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  5. Almost the exact same thoughts and feelings have occurred to me over the last 3 years of being a SAHM. It is hard. I have a $100,000 education and I am at home every day singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and making mac and cheese and finger painting with my 3yo. Ahhhh ha ha ha! It makes me laugh when our friends talk about vacations, new cars, phones etc or just going out for a drink. Somedays I feel like I won't ever have the free time I crave and used to enjoy. Most days, around 5 or 6 o'clock I see parents coming home from work after picking their kids up from day care and I feel proud and satisfied and happy.

    The money we don't have now for __X____ we will have later and our family will have something that money cannot buy. As a married couple, we sacrifice time together and time to ourselves a lot, but we also focus on making those times we do have together worth it. We plan our menus for most nights, we try to budget, we always sit down to dinner as a family. I don't do play groups or play dates a lot. We don't have our daughter in any classes because we can't afford it. I pretty much schedule the day depending on how we feel in the morning: what time we get up, the weather, what needs to be done in the garden. I really don't think most people "get it" unless they have done it before. They don't get how your house can become a prison some days and how going to get a cup of coffee with a friend can be like a mini vacation!
    Here are our blogs we keep, the first one is our daughter's (written by her dad!) and the second is mine:

    http://abigailmariethomason.blogspot.com/

    http://southprairiestreetfarm.blogspot.com/

    I've read your blog for almost 3 years now and am glad that you share your life with such candid grace. Have a great day!

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  6. no advice but all these words spoke to me today especially this one:

    Caught in a hollow place of looking back and looking forward

    as i type this i am reading blogs and ironing wax paper pressed leaves. it should be meditative as I sit here and count how long the iron is on, but somehow i can't help but multitask.

    i have no answers, how to manage it all, but somehow it never goes away this urge to create. i used to try to carve out things day by day but now i work month to month. sewing, writing, photo editing, it seems easier to break it into bigger chunks of time for those crazy days.

    this month i will work on.............

    all in all, i know i just have to enjoy these moments as hectic as they are, looking forward to seeing your Christmas present!



    sewing, wr

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